I need a car, inexpensive but reliable. MATILDA It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me. Mum says I'm a good case for population control. This still, unbroken skin, Are you listening? I'm the best! Or even two, Bruce, BRUCE wilts by the desk. Matilda: Jenny: Do I allow pigs in my school? And worst of all, when the girl was five, her father died. . . Agatha Trunchbull: Yesterday, she caught Julius Rottwinkle eating a gobstopper during science. And if you want to make the team, She starts the video screens playing again. [to MATILDA] You! . . MR WORMWOOD, towel wrapped about his shoulder, enters the bathroom with MICHAEL. Harry Wormwood: You should be embarrassed. . Lights up. One day Jen, you'll see that everything I do is for your own good. Have another marshmallow, Dip face. His whatchamacallit. Of course! "'The Burning Woman, Hurling Through the Air, with Dynamite in Her Hair, over Sharks and Spiky Objects, Caught By the Man Locked in a Cage', and it is the most dangerous feat ever known to man! Think of the possibilities.". . Children are maggots! MISS TRUNCHBULL Harry Wormwood: "I don't have any muggle money, but I do have a sickle and two knuts.". Funny Tinder pickup lines. MATILDA picks up various bottles from the vanity and reads from their labels. [to MISS HONEY] You don't! Dec 15, 2021 - Explore Matilda A.skott's board "pickup lines" on Pinterest. Sign in|Recent Site Activity|Report Abuse|Print Page|Powered By Google Sites. This is the cottage from your story! I'll tell ya, six hours a day of school IS NOT enough. Jane Eyre . Matilda: Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Pathetic, little me. . [He throws the phone to the lackey.] 2. It's not mine! Agatha Trunchbull: Use the rod, beat the child, that's my motto. That was Miss Honey. It's the female minor. Well, you got a light. Instead, she's found me. Agatha Trunchbull. Miss Trunchbull, Matilda Wormwood is a genius! Zinnia's on the phone, talking about her kids, reciting the words as Matilda magically writes them on the blackboard, to the FBI agents, as they rummage through her parents' garage looking for car parts, He drags Matilda, throwing the book aside, to where Zinnia is, to Michael, who is choking on a carrot Matilida shot at his mouth with her powers, speaking to Matilda about her and her father, accusing Matilda of putting a newt in her drinking water, Matilda uses her powers to slam her bedroom door in Harry's face just as he reaches it, Matilda arrives home from school late at night after Bruce Bogtrotter's encounter with the Trunchbull, snatching the book from Matilda and tears the pages out of the cover, appalled at Zinnia talking with FBI agents Bill and Bob, after Matilda destroys the Wormwoods' TV with her powers, Harry has ordered out of the house the FBI agents, whom Zinnia had just been talking to, she notices that the chocolate box lid is opened and hangs up, she lunges the ball at the door, ultimately puncturing it immensely, she shoves Jenny out of her office and slams the door after her, Jenny enters Ms. Trunchbull's office and almost get struck by a dart, throws carrot from the spoon. The CHILDREN and BIG KIDS take off their blazers and throw them on top of him. [She flicks on the light of the vanity in her parent's bathroom, which has risen from the stage. I still don't see how you glued your hat on, Harry. Wonderful. MATILDA You have just made a very big mistake. Matilda Wormwood! I'll be watching you, each and every one. Try to be funny, or clever, or both! Her life was good and happy. He's going to blow. Jun 15, 2018 - Explore Kristin Wichman's board "Matilda quotes" on Pinterest. What a dear! MISS HONEY steps away from MATILDA as MISS TRUNCHBULL enters by the blackboard. MISS TRUNCHBULL Well? More than one. You wouldn't beat them in a race! Oh, my lovely hair! (Bruce!) Jenny: I love books. I sold it for $1,158. He's eaten it all. The condition is characterised by the sufferer experiencing bouts of chronic fatigue, and falling suddenly asleep, often without knowing, or any warning at all. Come along, Bogtrotter. DOCTOR MRS WORMWOOD Piacelli. 9:17, suspect exits domicile. [on the phone, yells] But she was about to discover she had a strength a strength she wasn't even aware of. %PDF-1.5 Oh, my hair! MRS WORMWOOD And you know where you'll end up? 1. MRS WORMWOOD What are you talking about? They're individual! ESCAPOLOGIST [off-stage] Knock on the door, Jenny. [He takes out a cigar and takes hold of the baby.] Back before my life had eNded, CHILDREN WOMAN: Smile for mummy! No. I love my school it isn't fair! Don't be disgusting! You will be put away in a place where not even the crows can land their droppings on you! Oh, my good Lord. . [off to the side] [looks at Miss Honey and warning the children they were watching us] AMANDA [She takes MATILDA by the wrist and leads her to ERIC's desk.] A purple spotlight starts to make its way from Bruce across the classroom. Their sadness overwhelmed them, and drew them into ever more dangerous feats, as their work became the only place they could escape the inescapable tragedy of their lives! [Jenny enters Ms. Trunchbull's office and almost get struck by a dart]. . MISS HONEY "thinking". MRS WORMWOOD That love and fate and a touch of stupidity Where are the children's books? Oh, I look nice. [bends down] MR WORMWOOD . What's wrong with me? MRS WORMWOOD Harry Wormwood: Good hair means a good brain. We can't leave valuable packages sitting out on the doorstep. Have been trapped inside this cage for ages, Or maybe your largeness MISS HONEY MRS PHELPS exits as a siren wails and the scene changes to Crunchem Hall Academy. Yes. Zinnia Wormwood: Chew your food; you're an animal! Their furniture is wheeled off the stage and a hat rack with MR WORMWOOD's hat and an umbrella is brought center stage. Boys and girls! MATILDA Harry Wormwood: The most common thing in life is life . Everyone is born, but not everyone is born the same. And yet every single life, WOMAN: Well, take another! I think in effect, I sold it for $2,269. MR WORMWOOD CHILDREN 1 125 Best Tinder & Bumble Pick Up Lines That Are Funny, Cute and Totally Flirty Up your online dating game with these sweet one-liners. [throws carrot from the spoon. Like hell! The Birthday table is wheeled back in by other children. My word is my law! This morning, you sneaked like a serpent into the kitchen and stole a slice of my private chocolate cake from my tea tray. You're a disgusting criminal, aren't you? When the hinges creak and the door is closed, NIGEL runs in up the steps stage left, screaming. I think you'll want your trousers loose. You're better off raising tomatoes. [everyone in the room except Miss Trunchbull and Miss Honey join in]. You're almost finished. The guy with the stupid haircut! Find the bally line and toe it, No, no, no, no [ad lib. Jenny: I didn't do anything! Narrator: And if you cry it will be (W) double. . Right. MATILDA The less you have to say, the louder you yell it. Four judges in outrageous costumes sit behind it. WHY ARE ALL THESE WOMEN MARRIED? Miss Jennifer 'Jenny' Honey: Matilda, you promised you wouldn't go back into that house. . [chanting with the rest of the class] What's what, Ms. Trunchbull? There's another crime in the making, your car is about to run a stop sign. My daddy says I'm his special little soldier. MISS TRUNCHBULL The cook enters, holding an enormous chocolate cake on a tray, along with a wooden spoon. Come stai? She puts down the large block and MATILDA stands on it. She uses the umbrella to bring down the hat and starts lining it with glue.]. . They never stood a chance. Do you think you could tell me what two times twenty-eight is? National Green Hair Day! Are you going to tell me a story or not? MRS WORMWOOD Michael: . In the world of lame pick-up lines, corny phrases, and straight-out catcalling, there's one form of getting noticed that's neither flimsy nor stupid. Once upon a time, the two greatest circus performers in the world an escapologist who could escape from any lock that was ever invented, and an acrobat who was so skilled it seemed as if she could actually fly fell in love, and got married. MATILDA said the wife, smiling sadly and slipping her hand into his. Somewhere along the way, my dear, And . "It is where the loneliness of life has led us.". With every swallow, you are tightening the noose. 'Cause if you're little, you can do a lot. MR WORMWOOD BIG KID [TAMIKA] MATILDA and the ACROBAT'S SISTER [off-stage] Pizza is my second favorite thing that I eat in bed. What? You don't have to cry, you don't have to shout . 'Twas written in the stars before they even met. MR WORMWOOD Zinnia Wormwood: FBI Agent Bob: [He dances backwards and MRS WORMWOOD follows along.]. MISS HONEYbeckons MATILDA to the back of the class. Narrator: I'll come in there and pound your miserable hide! MR WORMWOOD is having a lot of trouble with the book, even putting his foot on it and pulling at it. She hates it when I go out. BIG KIDS It's time you learned the family business. The subsequent fall was inevitable. [to the FBI agents, as they rummage through her parents' garage looking for car parts] I think she might be an idiot. We can have our cake and eat it , Ah-ah-aah-ah What is the school motto, Miss Honey? What a pleasure to see you. You The more that you try, Smile for mummy, smile for mother. Amanda Thripp: Are you crying? She didn't know. Mr. Wormwood: Where is the maggot known as Nigel? I'm sorry, doctor. MISS TRUNCHBULL Here. I can see we're not going to agree, are we? Am I . And therefore, she is guilty! in . Matilda: her knickers stayed stuck to the seat! The CHILDREN and BIG KIDS step back, leaving AMANDA in a spotlight. Told me to watch out for the brat, though; says she's a real wart. I'll tell you tomorrow. They were left out there for the whole world to see because you weren't here to take 'em in! DOCTOR a contract. MATILDA AAAIIGHHH! I mean . MRS WORMWOOD exits. We're rehearsing. And she keeps trying to tell me stories, Harry. Science pick up lines 1. If,1,null Matilda Pick Up Lines. Miss Honey: And . . That's it! And if I couldn't teach, I'd have nothing at all. What is your name? That's not fair! . For being a smart aleck! The group sets off party poppers down the line. MATILDA BRUCE turns around and burps for a full ten seconds. Neigh! MICHAEL gets up and MR WORMWOOD sits down on his recliner. It must be wonderful for a child to be so wanted. . No! I'm not guilty! RUDOLPHO That didn't happen. Matilda? And Jenny's outside. MISS HONEY hurries to pull the cap from NIGEL's mouth. Cake. 3 0 obj You've never set foot in a library. Matilda, isn't it? DOCTOR I've got a plane to catch at three. Harry Wormwood: Why? Ever since the day doc chopped the umbilical cord, have you read a whole book? Matilda: MISS TRUNCHBULL turns off the screens with a remote and wheels around, holding a magnifying glass. Refresh the page, check Medium 's site status, or. Is there still time for the Bi-Annual Inter-Championship Amateur Sausage . MATILDA Corny, sweet, and funny all in one. And if it's not right, NIGEL Merriam-Webster defines a "pick-up line" as "a prepared remark used by a person to start a conversation with a stranger they are interested in having a romantic relationship with". MATILDA, LAVENDER, and NIGEL raise their hands. We can have our cake and it it too! It's just that they want that child so very much. Well done, Bogtrotter. Jenny: If you were six-and-a-half, you'd be in school already. "AMANDA" drops from the rafters above the audience into a pile of coats underneath her. MR WORMWOOD She laughs. Life's a ball, so learn to throw it, Michael chokes the carrot, while putting baby Matilda in the sink to rinse away spinach, Miss Honey briefly nods yes as she leaves to rescue Matilda from the Chokey, Harry walks down to the kitchen, unaware that his hair has just turned an unhealthy platinum blonde, Michael's mouth drops open in shock upon seeing Harry's hair, walks into the dining room and looks in the mirror, throwing marshmallows as Matilda was grabbing the book that was thrown, the Trunchbull's car, sold to her by Harry Wormwood, has broken down, forcing her to haul it all the way back to her house, Matilda and Miss Honey arrive at Miss Honey's cottage, realizes the Trunchbull is Miss Honey's aunt, Matilda and Miss Honey walk past the Trunchbull's house, as the TV explodes, due to Matilda's powers, looks at Miss Honey and warning the children they were watching us, after smashing the entire cake platter over Bruce Bogtrotter's head, causing the children to stop cheering. 21. Ev-er-y life is unbelievably unlikely. I have suffered in this Jail, Flashbulbs go off. Oh, y -, [she notices that the chocolate box lid is opened and hangs up]. google_color_text="5F6A72"; [sees a painting of Ms. Trunchbull] No, Miss Trunchbull. It's . MATILDA She laughs. MRS PHELPS Here in the library again, are we? Now, get out of here, you little stink worm! You know what interruptions do to my energy flow. Agatha Trunchbull: . He always wears suits with loud plaid prints read analysis of Mr. Wormwood. Behind MR WORMWOOD and MATILDA, the scene changes from a living room to MATILDA's bedroom. MATILDA and ACROBAT [off stage] 1 0 obj In the slip of a bolt, there's a tiny revolt. The stage goes black. No one's gonna love you if you don't know the rumba. She's probably having a meeting or something and won't want to be interrupted. MRS WORMWOOD A bell rings. MATILDA Cute pick-up lines can help you get past the awkwardness of meeting someone for the first time. Don't waste this. Special guest towards the end. Secrets. The time has come to put that tumbly-tum to use. Matilda Wormwood: I wonder what Miss Trunchbull is afraid of. You're supposed to be teaching SPELLING, not poetry! The school bell rings and all the children march out. The teacher's clearly falling short. MR WORMWOOD enters, puffing on a cigarette. MRS WORMWOOD BIG KIDS I've got my deal today with the Russians. If they start to squeeeeze out of your ears, you're going to need help. MR WORMWOOD enters with a lackey, who sits on a tyre behind him. MATILDA That's the bananas right there. Don't just stand there like a wet tissue. . And this gown is nothing like the semi-formal, She's going to be your teacher. Lost your appetite? . YoU listen here, my dear, . Harry Wormwood: Before I first heard the pealing of the bell. We have everything . Hey, sleep with me.I am not scary.I'm really rich.I'm Drew Carey. I'll come back later, then. Maryn Liles Feb 17, 2023 It's no lie that online dating. She exits, not before scratching her behind and wiping her nose. . 4. In my school? Oh, it will only take a moment. Well, I'll pay you back, young lady. Not dressed in hospital cotton, I heard Meowth's not the only mischievious pussy in town. Zinnia Wormwood: Her mind? . He screams and turns around, hitting ERIC's cap against ERIC's desk. The couples and the children overlap the next two verses, as children split themselves among five couples and execute rote choreography. Miracle! So innocent I asked a thousand questions. And . So go and put some highlights in your hair. . What? Agatha Trunchbull: google_color_bg="EDC7C2"; Indeed, sir. Harry Wormwood had unintentionally given his daughter the first practical advice she could use. This living 'eLl. Dinners don't microwave themselves, you know! to the rules. . BRUCE MISS HONEY [Miss Trunchbull has accused Matilda of going into her house]. She uses them to carry on a conversation. You chose books. What do I have to do to gain respect around here? A curtain is wheeled in with the words "5 YEARS AGO" painted on it. [She shoves ERIC out of his seat so MATILDA can stand on his desk.]. [She exits down the steps and stops behind the first portion of the audience.] A contract is a contract is a contract! 2. To unlock that power, all she had to do was practice. 4. BACKGROUND SINGERS MATILDA sits to the side, reading a book. I chose looks! Stop being pathetic, Jenny. She rented it from this lovely rhubarb farmer for just $50 a month, and she covered it in honeysuckle, and she planted hundreds of wildflowers, and she moved out of her wicked aunt's house, and she finally got her freedom. Matilda is a very intelligent and determined young girl appearing in the Roald Dahl children's book of the same name. Did you see all those packages outside? Did we sell some cars today, honeydew? You can be all cynical, cancelled! . [to his partner] But the thing was, I was having a lot of trouble with my belly. One look at my face and it's plain to see. MATILDA MATILDAThe moved into a beautiful old house at the edge of town, and in the evenings, they would walk and take the air. And now she's after me! PICK UP LINES! Russian businessmen: very, very stupid! MISS TRUNCHBULL What about rules, Honey? The DOCTOR and the CHILDREN sing into their stethoscopes. . You missed it. . And if you can't read sentences, you've got no chance with books. Dr. Seuss Pick Up Lines. Nonsense. Stand out from the crowd! Listen, you little wiseacre: I'm smart, you're dumb; I'm big, you're little; I'm right, you're wrong, and there's nothing you can do about it. And expensive, $9.25 for a bar of soap? Get in the car, Melinda! MISS TRUNCHBULL It was like the entire world had gathered to see The Burning Woman, Hurling Through the Air, with Dynamite in Her Hair, Over Sharks and Spiky Objects, Caught By the Man Locked in a Cage. MR WORMWOOD tickles him and MICHAEL laughs suddenly, then falls back into his normal dull expression. [to MATILDA] You! Imagine what she is going to do to a horrible, squeaky little goblin like you, boy. ? Don't be pathetic! Harry Wormwood: Sixteen times two is thirty-two. Two, three, four! Yes. Nicholas Nickleby . Connections 9:17 is correct. Semi-Spanish gown Even if what you got is not a lot. MATILDA pauses for several moments, holding the dolls in front of her contemplatively. And good luck with the Tolstoy. But I'm his little soldier. And I never understood you, not one little bit Who's got a pen? But I shan't enjoy it, because of the despicable way in which you have spoken to me tonight. Useless, flamin' car! What do you want, Miss Chutney? Antibiotics, or . . You wanted cake, you got cake! Trivia abilities. The biggest burp I had ever heard about! What on earth did you do that for? One hundred and fifty-five brand new luxury cars, sir. google_color_link="000000"; . You gotta give yourself permission to shine. Three judges hold up signs reading "10" as MRS WORMWOOD sits on the table. Your parents must be so proud to have a girl as clever as you. But to me, they tell a deeper story. Matilda? Thank you for suggesting it. MISS TRUNCHBULL hurries over to AMANDA. We've curated this list of inspiring 'Matilda' quotes from the book and the movie. Does that mean I can get that new TV? That's not normal for a five-year-old. They're like insects: they should be got rid of as early as possible. This calls for a proper smoke. And remember to be extremely careful. Might she be a little brighter than her class? DOCTOR Harry Wormwood: Yes. This is the cottage from your story. Might as well be saying you think that it's okay, All right. Oh, my good Lord! Don't take me to Chokey! [strikes a desktop with her riding crop and all the children instantly face forward] Yes. Just so you all know, she's my best friend! MISS TRUNCHBULL Amanda Thripp: You're a liar and a scoundrel, and your father's a liar and a cheat, one of the most corrupt lowlifes in the history of civilization! Take another picture of our angel from this angle over here. google_color_url="320000"; My father's portrait used to hang there. I've often thought about it, but I can't abandon my children. DOCTOR MR WORMWOOD xYoH)SSY w:!>8615Nqrf Ukg73y,=zr%|X*p ao{~~O{Hp '|\|WOKk%eMJ|lKi@w+g#ZIW0uCAp`i A member of the mafia! AMANDA and ERIC At night, they listened to the silence of their big, empty house, and they would imagine how beautiful it would be if it was filled with the sound of a child playing.
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